If your holiday gift list is longer than your grocery list (and somehow just as expensive), this one’s for you. We asked more than 5 million Skimm’rs for their tried-and-true tips on splitting up holiday gifting without breaking their budget, and dozens generously spilled their family shopping secrets.
We picked the ones with the greatest possible chance of saving you the most money and sparing you a few awkward conversations, then sorted them by situation. Find the solve to your gift-giving nightmares and steal the system that fixes it.
The issue: Your family keeps growing, but your budget doesn’t
The hat trick
Put everyone’s name in a hat, adults and kids included, and have each adult pull one of each. That’s your whole list: two gifts, no matter how big the family gets.
— Sayle M., New York, NY
Pro tip: Not all in the same room? Several other readers recommended Elfster and Giftster for picking names online. (Elfster will even make sure you don’t pull your own spouse.)
Let the kids run the gift exchange
The adult siblings stopped buying for each other, and now each kid draws one cousin’s name, with help from their parents. It cuts out a lot of people but makes it way more manageable.
— Hannah D., Denver, CO
Hannah says that the kids come out ahead, since each one gets a gifter who can “go deeper on things they like.” The grandparents still get presents, but siblings often pool their money for one big gift.
The issue: You’re all just swapping gift cards
Kids get presents, adults get food
Only the kids get gifts from their aunts and uncles, until they turn 18. Adults who want to exchange something trade baskets of local food ($75–$100), so everybody eats and no one ends up with more stuff.
— Rosie L., Mohnton, PA
Before you make your case for buying everyone gift cards instead, Rosie says that’s not the point: “Nobody wants that.”
The issue: Opening gifts feels like a price comparison
One big, two littles, zero comparing
Give everyone one big gift and two littles. The big one is usually $75–$100, and the littles, like nostalgic candy, mini products, or a Kindle gift card, come in under $20 total. Each person sets their own budget for the big gift, but everyone gets the same number of presents.
— Taylor T., Nashville, TN
Taylor says matching the number of gifts, not the dollar amount, cuts down on hurt feelings and “makes things feel fair.” Plus, thanks to the number of little gifts, it feels like you’re opening a lot of presents.
The issue: The kids are drowning in toys
The four-gift rule
Give each kid four gifts: something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read.
— Megan L., Dallas, TX
Pro tip: Megan’s kids also do a book exchange with their cousin, which she says limits toys. It helps her whole family, grandparents included, keep things reasonable, since “no one wants a playroom full of unused toys that cost a small fortune.”
Grandma’s on stocking duty
Before stocking stuffers and festive PJs get out of hand and make bigger gifts harder to afford, let grandma take over with one simple rule: Stick to hygiene stuff, snacks, and maybe a gift card.
— Elizabeth P., Charleston, SC
The issue: Your family is spread out all across the map
The $35 sweet spot
Draw names and aim for about $35. Why $35? Free shipping, which matters when your family is scattered across the East, West, and South.
— Eileen R., Prosper, TX
Budgets in Eileen’s family vary, too, so keeping it low “helps to keep shipping and purchasing costs low while everyone still gets to participate,” she says. And since they can’t all be in the same room, the whole family gets on a group video chat on Christmas, which Eileen says “keeps us together while still apart.”
The issue: Your budget is smaller than everyone else’s
The gift nobody can price-check
Skip the stuff and donate in each other’s names, matching each cause to the person.
— Cathy M., Cocoa, FL
Cathy’s mom loves gardening, so she gets a donation to a save-the-bees group. Her dad is a veteran, so his goes to K9s for Warriors. And her sister-in-law loves elephants, so hers goes to a wildlife refuge in Africa. The money “goes to someone or something that really needs it,” says Cathy. “If it’s a tight year financially, no one knows how much or little we donated.”
The issue: Nobody needs more stuff
Trash to treasure
Host a swap where every gift is something you’d otherwise donate, recycle, or toss, so it costs nothing. Everyone draws a number. On your turn, unwrap a gift from the pile or steal one. You only get one steal. After that, if someone takes your gift, you pick a new one from the pile.
— Bonnie M., Ottawa, ON
Pro tip: Bonnie’s strategy is simple: It’s “best to be last in this game.” She says her in-laws saved finds all year for their family’s swap, and the most coveted prize was a rubber chicken. “Everyone wanted that thing.”
The themed swap where “lame” gifts aren’t forgotten
Pick a theme, set a price, ban gift cards, and let people “steal.”
— Teri M., Palm Springs, CA
Teri’s family has gone with themes like a favorite city, gadgets, or something that smells good, at a price anywhere from $30 to $100, and kids get their presents separately. Whoever hosts decides how everyone picks a gift, whether that’s pulling numbers out of a bag or rolling dice. Just bring your A game. “If someone brings a ‘lame’ gift they will live with the shame until the next Christmas,” says Teri. “This Christmas is my chance for redemption.”
The issue: You’re the one doing all the shopping
Avoid the December creep
Start in September and buy for at least two people a month.
— Elizabeth R., Louisville, KY
Elizabeth also splits the list with her husband, who buys for his side of the family. She calls it “equitable division of labor.” The payoff is “zero last-minute panic.” Sign us up.
The hand cream strategy
Pick one great gift for your friends and buy it in multiples.
— Tracy M., Jacksonville, FL
Tracy might go with personalized stationery, a luxurious hand cream, or a pretty pashmina. One decision covers everyone. And if your family needs convincing, take her advice: “Discuss it over Thanksgiving. Or just announce it.”
The issue: You have too many people to buy for
Wait for the sales
Draw names for the main gifts, and hold the “cheap swap” until prices drop.
— Sarah E., Garnet Valley, PA
In Sarah’s family, each adult draws one name and buys for that person on an agreed-upon budget, so she’s shopping for one adult “rather than five.” Then, a few days after the holiday, her family plays a Yankee Swap (a white elephant–style game where you can steal someone else’s gift) with a much smaller budget to take advantage of post-holiday sales.