Fertility·2 min read

How can I support a friend who’s getting fertility treatment?

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Dear Expert,

How can I support a friend who’s getting fertility treatment?

Dear Anonymous,

The best thing you can do is make sure they know that you have an open door to talk, because oftentimes going through fertility treatments can feel very isolating.A friend might not want to burden you with their struggle. 


You can also try saying things like: 

  • “Hey, I want to be a part of this with you. How can I help?”

  • “Can I drive you to any of your appointments, even if I just waited in the car?” 

  • “Are you hungry? Can I bring you a snack?” 


Just making it so that it's easy for somebody to say “yes,” because that person who's going through infertility might already feel left out of the other stages of people's lives — left behind, isolated, and lonely.


One of the worst things you can say to somebody: “You can always adopt or use donor eggs if it doesn't work.” That minimizes their current plan and what they’re working so hard to achieve.

Ask an Expert is for informational purposes only, does not constitute medical advice, and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician, mental-health professional, or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. By submitting a question, you are agreeing to let theSkimm use it—in part or in full—and we may edit its answer for length and/or clarity.

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